The Story of Ben and I

This past weekend I got engaged!! It was a perfect proposal at one of my favorite places in the world, Newport Beach at sunset. It was a day that I’m sure many questioned if it would ever come.

I first met Benjamin Adam Mikell four years ago at Brownstone apartment complex in Provo. Originally I had planned on going home to work for the summer but those plans changed when Bishop Ang asked me to stay and serve as relief society president for the YSA ward. Anyone who was there at Brownstone that summer would probably agree that it was one of the most epic summers of all time. Everyone was friends and we all just did everything together. Because of that, I knew who Ben was but I didn't KNOW Ben, he was never really on my radar. I had been home from my mission for a year and he was a 20 yr old premie with LOTS of facial hair. We hung out together because that’s what everyone did but I don’t know if we had ever actually held a conversation. He moved back to Tennessee at the end of the summer and I didn't think anything of it.

Hanging out at the park in Provo. "Sledding" down the hill in the sprinklers. 

I remember one Sunday having a note delivered to my apartment. It was a note from the love note box – you know, one of those cheesy things that you would only ever possibly find in Provo, where they pass around a box and allow you to put in “love” notes to other random wardies? This one caught my attention though because it was super funny and flirtatious and completely anonymous. I think I had been getting the notes every Sunday for like a month before I finally figured out who they were from. I don’t remember how I figured it out but it turns out that Ben’s sister Alli, who still lived at our complex, had been writing me love notes on Ben’s behalf and under his direction.

I text him one night to thank him for the notes and we just started talking. We talked off and on for the next four years. For some periods we would talk every day other times we would go months without talking—or years if you take into account the time he was on his mission. Sometimes our conversations were just goofy and flirtatious, other times more serious and thought provoking. I still never thought much about them. He seemed like a cool kid but I had way too much going on in my life to think too much about this kid who lived across the country and was getting ready to go on a mission.

I remember reading one day on his sister’s facebook page that Ben would soon be coming home from his mission. My mind was filled with fond memories of goofy conversations and a boy who had always been so kind and thoughtful. I immediately sent him a facebook message and told him to shoot me a text when he had the chance. Things picked up right where they left off, we never skipped a beat. He still had his life and I still had mine (at this point I was focused on trying to get established in my career and trying to make a home for myself in St George) but I always knew he was there for me to chat about life or whatever it may be and he was ALWAYS good for a laugh.

Last spring Ben told me he would be coming out west to do a few EFY sessions at BYU. I told him after years of unabashed flirting he should come down to St George and take me on a date. He just seemed like he would be a fun person to go on a date with and I knew that he would treat me just right.  And so he did. He actually stopped by St George on his way home from California where he had been visiting his mission. He was only supposed to stay for a day but we had so much fun together he decided to stay another. We had a blast just goofing off and having fun together. I was a little nervous about the whole thing because really we had never really hung out just him and I, we had never had an actual conversation in person. None of that seemed to matter though, it just seemed like we had always been good friends.

There was just one problem. I was kinda dating someone else at the time. Nothing exclusive but we had been on quit  a few dates and were spending a lot of time together. Ben lived in Tennessee and the boy I was dating lived in St George. The practical side in me didn't even question it, Ben was a nice, fun, awesome kid but we could never be. I don’t do the whole long distance relationship thing.

And so, Ben headed back to Provo and I went back to my life. Still, he had left quite the impression on me and I couldn't but help wonder "what if?". We started e-mailing back and forth while he was doing EFY and I decided that I had to give the guy a shot. I had to see if there was actually any potential.

I went up to Salt Lake to hang out with him for a weekend but there was just so much going on that weekend I wasn't quite my normal self. I just didn't know what to do. Still, there was just something that drew me to him. Something that made me want to put in the effort to see if things could really work (anyone who knows me knows that’s not normally my style).

The summer continued on and I continued dating St George boy while keeping in touch with Provo/Tennessee boy. I was trying to be as fair as possible to both of them--they both knew about the other--but I knew I couldn't keep stringing them both along forever. I had to make a decision. I just didn't know what to do. One day I went out to dinner with my friend Clint and we spent the whole night talking about our complicated love lives. Something he said though just clicked in my head and in that moment I knew that I chose Ben. I didn't know if things would work out between us or not but I had to give it a shot. He was worth it. I felt like he was the one who would help me be the person I want to be.

And so Ben and I started dating. As soon as he was done with EFY he came back to St George to hang out for a little bit then I flew out to Tennessee to meet his family and spend time with them. At the end of that trip we packed up his car and drove the almost 1600 miles from Memphis, Tennessee to St George, Utah. I figured if we could survive spending that much time in a car together we actually had a pretty good shot of making this work. 

That was about three and a half months ago that he moved here to St George and I must say things have turned out pretty good for us. He is so different from the guy I always pictured myself ending up with and yet I think he is everything I need to help me become who I need to be. He’s kind, considerate, compassionate, and intelligent, has the patience of Buddha, is always willing to try new things and go on adventures with me, and most of all, he ALWAYS treats me like a queen.

I can’t wait to start this new adventure together. I can’t wait to travel the world together, learn new things together, and build an eternal family together.